Microkhan by Brendan I. Koerner

Avast, Ye Scurvy Dogs

February 18th, 2009 · No Comments

I tend to distrust state-run news organizations, so color me skeptical upon reading this “doth protest too much” story from Russia’s RIA Novosti. It seems there have been some rumors floating about that crewmen on a Russian frigate came down with scurvy while patrolling the waters off Somalia. The official denial goes:

“Reports of technical failures that allegedly occurred and crew members suffering from scurvy are crude and cynical mistruths that insult the sailors and their relatives,” Capt. 1st Rank Igor Dygalo said.

“Technical failures” cause scurvy? Like, the food replicator was broken and you couldn’t create any citrus fruits? Or did you accidentally fill your pre-voyage larders with nothing but hard tack and dried, salted meat?

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