Microkhan by Brendan I. Koerner

Entries Tagged as 'Russia'

Accept Your Lot in Life

October 24th, 2012 · 1 Comment

Whoever was in charge of putting together this orientation handbook (PDF) for St. Petersburg’s migrant workers probably had the best of intentions. Yet their decision to portray those workers as mere tools, as opposed to flesh-and-blood humans like the welcoming Russians, was a revealing faux pas. As a Tajik blogger so forcefully put it: We […]

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Hopping to Oblivion

July 17th, 2012 · 12 Comments

The Jenga-like nature of markets is revealed in the tale of Australia’s kangaroo-meat crisis. There was a time when steaks and chops taken from Down Under’s most celebrated marsupials seemed destined to become a staple of butcher’s shops the world over. No country developed a more ravenous appetite for kangaroo meat than Russia, which came […]

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On the Downslope

March 15th, 2012 · Comments Off on On the Downslope

Unlike the fine fellows in the tsarist poster above, the title of which translates as “A Time for Relaxation,” I ain’t got time to kick back and Microkhan today. Still stuck on the second paragraph of my book’s fifteenth chapter, and I need to push through that block. Acquaint yourself with some fantastic Siberian artifacts, […]

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Hard Life in the Urals

March 13th, 2012 · 2 Comments

When I first traveled in the post-Soviet world many moons ago, one thing that struck me was how all the restaurant menus listed foods by specific amounts. In Michal Kováč-era Bratislava, one did not order a small or large platter of dumplings; you either got the 200-gram size or the 500-gram size. And I have […]

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Saints and Sinners

December 23rd, 2010 · Comments Off on Saints and Sinners

In the midst of researching an upcoming post on the cigarette economy in prisons, I came across this image of juvenile prisoners in Russia. I was struck by the extreme youth of these convicts, and thus motivated to look a bit more deeply into how Russia handles criminals who’ve yet to become adults. As I […]

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A Company Town’s Sudden Death

June 14th, 2010 · 1 Comment

While researching the economic feasibility of a Bering Strait tunnel, we came across this recent dispatch from the Edmonton Journal. In addition to alerting us to the manner in which the residents of Little Diomede were used as Cold War pawns, the article made us aware of the callow manner in which the Russian coal […]

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Krinklebein’s Poor Russian

May 28th, 2010 · Comments Off on Krinklebein’s Poor Russian

We’re still in northern Michigan with the Grand Empress, and you’re hopefully prepping for a raucous three-day weekend. As you pack or purchase beer, enjoy the sonic stylings of a talking fish and his feline arch-nemesis—one of Microkhan Jr.’s favorites. It really is a fine piece of animation, save for the fact that Mr. Krinklebein’s […]

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To Russia, With Relief

April 19th, 2010 · 2 Comments

We’re never able to resist a story that involves marauding monkeys, and so the latest news out of Bugala Island couldn’t help but catch our eyes. As palm-oil production has expanded on Bugala, red-tailed monkeys have steadily lost habitat. The crafty primates, in return, have taken to ravaging the palms, seeing as how their older […]

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The Inevitable Crackdown

March 29th, 2010 · 4 Comments

Today’s bombing of the Moscow Metro has elicited a predictable reaction from Ivan (and Ivana) Sixpack, who suddenly yearns for the KGB’s iron fist: “It’s the Chechens,” said Nina Ivanovna, a 57-year-old pensioner. “They will never let us live in peace. Solzhenitsyn correctly said that we should build a Great Wall of China to keep […]

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Farewell, Dynamite

December 21st, 2009 · Comments Off on Farewell, Dynamite

Sad news out of Moscow, as word comes that Vladimir “Dynamite” Turchinsky has passed on. For those unfamiliar with the realm of Russian bodybuilding and/or action films, Turchinsky could legitimately lay claim to the title of “The Schwarzenegger of the East,” having transitioned from a successful athletic career to cinematic stardom. He also had an […]

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Doing Away With the Veneer

December 3rd, 2009 · 8 Comments

Most authoritarians these days know better than to go the Papa Doc Duvalier route and declare themselves president-for-life. The occasional sham election does wonders in terms of keeping off the international heat, especially if your country is an important source of gas or bauxite. But Nursultan Nazarbayev seems to be seriously considering bucking the trend, […]

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Surrounded by Seeds

November 25th, 2009 · 1 Comment

As you tuck into your fourth helping of stuffing tomorrow evening, spare a few seconds to think about some of our less fortunate brothers from history—specifically the valiant disciples of Nikolai Vavilov, who deserves a place alongside Norman Borlaug in the pantheon of agricultural saints. Vavilov spent much of his career traveling the world in […]

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Stars and Stripes Pale in Comparison

November 10th, 2009 · 3 Comments

A pal of ours recently quipped that he’s always had a yen to visit Mozambique, albeit because he’s always dreamed of traversing the sandy beaches of the Bazaruto Archipelago. No, our friend is attracted to the nation for a single, simple reason: he digs flags that feature weapons, and Mozambique’s official banner certainly qualifies. Given […]

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Daily Bread

July 29th, 2009 · 3 Comments

Last night’s long subway ride afforded us an opportunity to start reading Ian Frazier’s Siberia travelogue in the latest New Yorker. So far, it’s every bit as astounding as we’d hoped—the long digression about Siberian butter, in particular, made our inner magazine geek nearly burst with glee. What can we say, we’re absolute suckers for […]

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The Mammoths’ Last Stand

July 22nd, 2009 · Comments Off on The Mammoths’ Last Stand

Yesterday’s news that a comet helped kill off the Ice Age’s most glorious creatures reminded us of this groundbreaking 1995 paper from the journal Radiocarbon. While most of the world’s mammoths disappeared long before mankind figured out the rudiments of civilization, a small pack of the elephant-like beasts survived until 2000 B.C. or later. Their […]

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The Lunar Also-Ran

July 20th, 2009 · Comments Off on The Lunar Also-Ran

As we spend today celebrating the 30th anniversary of mankind’s first visit to the Moon, it’s worth noting that America’s space-race triumph was far from pre-ordained. In fact, the smart money circa 1963 would have been on the Soviets reaching the goal first, due to the seldom recognized genius of Sergei Korolev. The man responsible […]

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Echoes of an Ink-Stained Martyr

June 19th, 2009 · 4 Comments

Among the many ghostly memories conjured up by Iran’s current tumult, the unsolved murder of Paul Klebnikov is one of the most unexpected. After all, Klebnikov was known primarily for his investigative journalism in Russia, where he exposed myriad tales of corruption, thuggery, and outright theft. Yet The Lede recently reminded us of Klebnikov’s fine […]

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Siberian of the Year

April 2nd, 2009 · Comments Off on Siberian of the Year

Just six days remain in the annual “Siberian of the Year” campaign, so y’all need to get on it and vote. This year’s roster of candidates tilts heavily toward athletes, particularly Olympic champions and disturbingly bronzed bodybuilders. But the Frozen East also produces its share of artists, most notably the late Egor Letov (who would […]

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In Post-Soviet Russia…

March 27th, 2009 · 8 Comments

…cops evidently go the extra mile with their community policing methods. Sorry, couldn’t quite conjure up a killer Yakov Smirnoff punchline out of this clip of Russian cops going all Michael Phelps. Free Microkhan t-shirt to anyone who can.

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Avast, Ye Scurvy Dogs

February 18th, 2009 · Comments Off on Avast, Ye Scurvy Dogs

I tend to distrust state-run news organizations, so color me skeptical upon reading this “doth protest too much” story from Russia’s RIA Novosti. It seems there have been some rumors floating about that crewmen on a Russian frigate came down with scurvy while patrolling the waters off Somalia. The official denial goes: “Reports of technical […]

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Great Moments in Fraud, Part I

February 12th, 2009 · 1 Comment

It comes as no surprise that the FBI is swamped with financial fraud cases nowadays. I knew this day of reckoning would someday come while watching The Real Housewives of Orange County on JetBlue a few years back. No financial system that could support such in-your-face opulence could possibly be on the up-and-up. (I remember […]

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